July 8, 2008


today is just a day.
i went to work.
sat in traffic for 45 mins.
finished some prints.
i thought a lot about money
and how it is impossible for me to make ends meet.

i decided i was through thinking about the person i am always thinking about. whom, coincidentally doesn't think about me.
i feel good about it. i feel ready to wash my hands clean of this person.
it's difficult for me to explain this situation because of certain people who may or may not be reading this. what i can say is that i have cared about a certain boy for quite some time now. we went from friends to more. but because of the distance between us, and our conflicting schedules, and secret agendas, and the opposite lives we lead that might as well place us on different planets - we have gone back to being friends... and by friends i mean he's friends with me when it's convenient for him.
it hurts me mostly because of his complete disregard and how it made me feel foolish for hoping to see him again and wanting to be with him.
what i have learned lately from this, is that sometimes out of site truly is out of mind.
between being busy with the art shows, making prints, summer trips, crazy nights with friends, and working like a mad woman, i have somehow managed to let go of him... or rather the idea of him.

***the photo above is a collage of polaroids i've taken this summer with my sx 70 - moments with friends lying on couches for countless hours, the treasures we found on walks in the woods, and cloudless summer skies. these polaroids aren't my best, but i feel like they are stronger together.


  1. i know how u feel, and you are right, keep busy and the feelings u have for him will eventually fade away. j

  2. i came to your page quite a while ago and i've always been fond of your words and thoughts and art. i think it was through flickr as i was wandering around in a polaroid pool. your work is incredible and your words flow like honey with its slightly bitter tendencies. it's quite lovely. you are.

    i hope to purchase some of your polaroids once i start working and have money on me.

    and i know that sort of feeling about him. but we move on.


  3. thank you both for your comments!
    i have this tendecy to fall for unavailable people.
    i think it means i am just not quite ready to settle on any one particular person yet... or maybe it means i like men who aren't around me alot. hahah. either way NO REGRETS!!

    stacey: you rock! thanks for the compliments on the polas :) let me know which ones you like. perhaps we can negotiate a trade?

  4. just keep busy, and after a while you will realize that your love will never die. but one day you will meet someone who is capable of receiving it. luv*

  5. this is sad...

    until i read this post, i always assumed it was Make ends meat. which never made sense, cause what exactly constitutes "ends meat"

    it didn't sound very appetizing.

  6. hahahahha!!!
    whoever left the last comment please reveal yourself!
    that was the funniest thing i've read in hours :)