this makes me happy

i feel horrible because i have not blogged in over a week!!! but this does not mean that there hasn't been anything going on. actually it's the exact opposite. so much has been happening that i haven't had very much time to document it.

right now i am sitting on my couch with a box fan pointing right at my face because it is 90 degrees in my house. YES.... the AC is broken again and i am uploading my polaroids from a week ago, half deaf in one ear while the turbo blasting, jet engine fan attempts to cool me off.

from all the polaroids i took on our trip i have to say that the one's with b in them are my favorite. i really like the sea horse, star fish, wind chimes too... but when i think of my time in st. augustine i think of b and how he made me feel so special, and beautiful, and happy.

even though it was like pulling teeth to get a photo of him... he doesn't think he is photogenic, i'd like to disagree.

now that i've been home a lot has happened. beyond the AC breaking down once again, i've learned some more shocking "health" news about myself. although i love sharing the ups and downs of my life with you all, there are some things that deserve to be kept unsaid... suffice it to say i am not dying and i will have a minor surgery next week, all in all it is just another "thing" i will have to push through, overcome, and chalk up as a learning experience.

there is so much on my plate right now, it's overwhelming to think about. last night i woke up at 4 am, restless from the aches, and i just laid there for an hour - eyes open, tossing and turning, worrying myself awake. i ended up telling myself "colie, go back to sleep. there is nothing you will figure out at 4:30 am that can solve all of these problems. at least enjoy this peace and quiet while you can." so i did.

life is so complicating. it really is. we can't escape the ups and downs. all we can do is approach them one at a time with patience, stay positive and hopeful, and never be afraid to ask for help.

:)